A Transformation of Every Kind.



      “And Jesus went about all Galilee teaching in their synagogues, preaching the gospel of the kingdom and healing all kinds of sickness and all kinds of diseases among the people.” Mathew 4:23

      “Jesus Christ, the same yesterday, today and forever.” Hebrews 13:8


      In all of the years I have walked with the Lord, I have come to know Him as my healer, not just physically but emotionally, mentally and spiritually. He was in the business of healing when He walked the earth and like Hebrews 13:8 tells us, He never changes!

      In these next 4 stories, I want to share some of the most memorable miraculous healings the Lord has bestowed upon me...each healing came about in different ways, yet they were all Gods handiwork. Thank you Lord that you are our healer and that you heal to the uttermost. Those who the Son of God sets free are FREE INDEED!


     He has broken the gates of bronze and cut the bars of iron in two.

      One of my favorite books of all time is, 'Under The Tuscan Sun', by Frances Mayes. Each chapter evokes excitement and a stirring within my soul as it is all about TRANSFORMATION. It is a wonderful analogy of how renovating and recreating a home is much like the Lords work within us as He heals us and makes us over into the image of Jesus. Under the Tuscan Sun is a novel (novella) about two Americans who visit Tuscany and fall passionately in love with an abandoned home in the beautiful Italian countryside. Throwing caution to the wind, they purchase 'Bramasole' and begin their journey to restore and transform this villa into their dream home.

       Frances shares in her novella about her first evening in their  villa; “On the first night, I dreamed that the real name of the house was not Bramasole but 'Cento Angeli.' One hundred Angels and that I would discover them one by one.”

       Their adventure in renovating and creating their desired haven does not happen over niLets travelght in fact, it takes many years, yet they place themselves in a state of patience, joy and awe as they enjoy their expedition and take in all  the bounty of treasured gifts that come along the way. They are in no hurry! They have to tear down walls, dig deep into the soil creating new wells as well as reconstruct colossal stone wall fences, stone by stone. This story reminds me of the Lord...He sees us already as finished products. He is patient, loving and full of grace as He begins to reconstruct us, tear down the things that hinder our growth and build us anew.  He is never in any hurry. (Though sometimes we wish He would be like Barbara Eden in 'I dream of Jeannie', fold His arms, blink and we would be recreated in a second.) The Lord is so gracious and He heals us (makes us new) to the uttermost, all  in the ways in which He chooses.

      Have you ever been to the wondrous and spectacular Disneyland? It is truly one of my  favorite places on earth...A magical world where I have  an abundance of dreamy and ecstatic childhood memories. A place where every time I enter its gates, my imagination soars with all of the magic and bliss of the park. I have always loved the Haunted Mansion in New Orleans Square. (It reminds me of my beloved south and all of its history with stunning and grand estates, creaking wood floors, the smells of fresh Jasmine and the mysterious fog banks that appear out of nowhere. ) As the thrilling ride comes to an end, there awaiting each carriage are three funny looking 'ghosts'. They are hitchhiking to get a ride out of the mansion. As a child my brothers and I would alw ays choose which ghost we wanted in our carriage, then as we looked into the magical mirrors of illusion as we exited the mansion to see which ghost came on board, we never got the one we wanted. It was all in jest, fun and make believe. As I was thinking about my first story to share, I had this image of the Haunted mansion and its “ghosts”...as it is apropos in the history of my first healing. As a little baby , (not so fun, make believe and in jest), I believe an unwanted and uninvited “spirit” got on board in my life...this unwanted guest's name was fear. The Lord has shown me some of the open doors it came through as well as the reasons it stayed clinging ever so tightly to me. The most important thing is that no matter its origins, fear is not of God and He is the deliverer of all of our fears.


      As a baby, toddler and little girl growing up into  my teens, I did not see nor was I aware of the cloak of fear that hung over me. Sometimes I think I built a wall around that fear...pushing it down into a deep place within my soul, never allowing it to be exposed to God or those closest to me. As I became a young woman and began to look back over all of those years, I recalled as a child having reoccurring nightmares, extreme anxiety, a terror of speaking in public, a tormenting angst of rejection and abandonment as well as an abnormal phobia of boys and men. When realizing all of this fear that seemed to grip me, I was comforted to also see that in the midst of it all, there were also many memories of the Lords love, grace, confidence and glorious works He had done in my life. In giving my life to Him when I was 13, He had begun His work to teach me to trust Him. As the Lord began shining His light on this fear, revealing the places it was hiding, He began the Healing! In order to grow more intimate with the Lord and trust Him fully, He had to get rid of my fear of Him first Can you imagine being afraid of the Lord Himself? Our creator and the lover of our soul? To this day, it still baffles me that I lived under such wrong impressions and mistruths.


      I will never forget this one specific morning. I was in my early 20's living in the Carolinas with my parents. Of all the things to be doing, I was busily brushing my teeth thinking about what outfit to wear when suddenly, the Lords presence surrounded me and He gave me quite a vivid vision. (He always shows up at such surprising times, doesn't He?) In this vision, I saw two entirely opposite images of God. On one side was God the father...angry, callous, unkind, a hard task master, unloving and unapproachable. The other vision was God the father, full of grace, mercy, smiling, eyes full of love, accepting and forgiving. My spirit filled up with an abundance of comfort and peace when fixing my heart upon the loving God. As soon as the visions ended, I heard Him speak to my spirit as clear as day. “Susan, I am one God. This dark image that you have seen (and at times believe is Me,) is not Me...it is a deception from your enemy. I am your father, full of love , compassion, mercy and grace. I love you with an endless love.”   His words filled my soul with such peace. I put my toothbrush down and hastily went to find my mom. I knew that I had to speak this revelation out loud. (Have you ever felt you would loose something so precious from the Lord if you did not write it down or speak it out loud?) I began to share with her what the Lord had just shown me. Looking up at her, I saw her eyes well up and she began to cry. As she put her loving arms around me she began to share her heart. I will never forget her sweet southern accent as she spoke words that to this day, I remember like it was just yesterday. “Susan, I am so sorry that you have carried such a wrong image and fear of the father heart of God for you. I have been praying for you. It breaks my heart  that you have had such a fear on you.  I first saw this fear manifest upon you the night your twin sister died. You and Kathy were so close, so tightly bonded, often times sleeping in the same crib. The day she died and the ambulance arrived, you were terrified, then afterward, every time you heard a siren you would shake and tremble with fear. I have watched you grow up and as I have seen this fear operate in your life, I just keep praying that the Lord will set you free. We hugged, cried together and prayed, agreeing together that God would indeed go to the root of all the fear and heal me. I felt a new lightness and HOPE as I knew that whatever God reveals, He Always Heals!

      God was already answering our prayers. Shortly after, while attending College in South Carolina, the Lord brought back a very disturbing memory. I was peacefully sitting in my seat in my Art History 101 class. Our professor was sharing the dark and eerie work of the renowned Francisco Goya. The minute I looked up at the screen and beheld the frightening painting 'The Colossus', I remembered the day I was sitting in our living room in Mission Viejo California. I was about 13 years old and was reading my parents grand selection of art books, one of those being the life and history of Goya. I was terrified as I looked through the book, seeing all of Goya's  graphic and violent paintings. 'The Colossus' .a dark painting of a gargantuan giant walking and stomping on its prey frightened me tremendously as I perceived the angry giant to be God my father. I had completely forgotten that memory. When I got home from my classes, I went before the Lord with this revelation. I wondered and was very perplexed as to why many of my times with the Lord were so precious and intimate. I knew Him, His presence, sweet voice and His love, yet at other times, (not understanding why) I thought of Him as harsh, mean and unkind and felt a very askew and unhealthy fear of Him. “Lord, for whatever reason I had perceived you as a child to be this monstrous being or an unkind, scary and unapproachable Father God, I ask you to heal me of this. Please show me as well as assure me of who you REALLY ARE. I want so desperately to always experience you as my loving father. Please Lord, make me whole.” He heard my cry and tore down more of the wall. (Likened to the Bramasole in Tuscany, He would tare down the old, false protective barrier and rebuild with a new wall, a new foundation built of HIS love and truth...) Thank you Lord.

      The closer I grew to Jesus, (each wall of fear destroyed by His grace), the more He shined the light on the other layers of fear that tormented me from within. Meeting Kit in California in 1988 , getting engaged in '89 and married in 1990, the Lord continued to heal me and show me His love in a new way. He gave me a man that not only loved Him but loved me with the unconditional love of Jesus. Through Kit and his kindness, servants heart, compassion and love, I began to see new attributes of the father heart of God!

      The time came when God knew I was ready...safe enough in Jesus, no longer fearing my “scary God” to get rid of that long time companion of fear on the inside once and for all. A bigger chunk of the wall would go and the finishing touches completed. It was a time in my life I will never forget. Kit and I were attending a new church after moving to the quaint and admirable city of Mesa Arizona in '92. The pastor, Allie, was a spirit filled lady and someone in whom I immediately bonded with and trusted in the Lord.  (Thank you Jesus.) I began going to her womens bible study every week. The Lord revealed to Allie that there had been a spirit of fear over me for a long, long time and did I want to get set free? “Wow, do you mean I could be set free from fear once and for all?” I cried with joy at the very thought as my natural instinct had always been to fear. (How would I learn to live anew without this companion who had been with me since as long as I could remember?) We met together two times, prayed and what happened next was beyond my comprehension. As Allie took authority and we agreed in Jesus name, I experienced a healing and deliverance like I had never known...The Lord reached deep within me and and literally took out the very root of this angst and trepidation that had been there so very long. Don't jump.... just kidding....   She is FREE!What began happening in my life was blithesome. Yes, the fearful thoughts still came at me but it was different...It was as if it was on the outside now and within my spirit was Jesus towering above the fear...and in His name, when I battled, it left, no longer ruling me for I ruled it, in the name of Jesus. Days and weeks after this miraculous happening, my husband could not tell me enough what a changed woman I was.  My personality, countenance and entire being had been transformed. Thank you Jesus for healing us to the uttermost , going to those depths we would not choose to go to...BUT YOU DO and YOU HEAL like no one can. Thank you Jesus for delivering me from the spirit of fear!

                     A supernatural transmogrification

       I am always in awe as I look at the miracle of how a Monarch butterfly lays t heir eggs on milkweed.  In wonderment, their eggs hatch in a short 3-6 days and wallah, a caterpillar is born. In just a mere 9 -14 days, the caterpillar is full grown. It then leaves the safety of the milkweed, finds a new place to begin its metamorphosis and in its chrysalis, (protected place of development), becomes a beautiful butterfly. Is this a story of transformation or What? When I look at this miracle of the Lord, (beholding all of His glory in nature), I am filled with such a joy as He is the same way with all of us, His precious kids, transforming and making us into His glorious vessels.

      Picture this setting. A cool and breezy Autumn California day.  I was dressed to a “T” as I entered Millers Outpost store in the Laguna Hills Mall. I arrived to interview for the dream job of every teenager....Standing beside my best friend Lisa was the most handsome guy I had ever seen. His name was Dylan. He looked like a cross between William Katt and Jermaine Jackson, (Two of my celebrity crushes at the time.) (Now you have got to  know I was praying even harder that the Lord would grant me this job.)

      Well, I got the job, (thank you Lord), and I met the guy...(thank you again Lord..I think!)


      At my new mature and quite advanced age of 19 years old, no one could convince me, (and believe me THEY TRIED), that this charming and gorgeous guy Dylan, that I had met and was getting to know, was not the right guy for me. WE all know how “first loves” can be.  In my mind, he was Mr. Right, a knight in shining amour and the only person I wanted to spend eternity with. (I just want to thank the Lord right now that he did not listen to me when I was so vehemently asking day and night for this guy to be “the one.” ) Little did I know that Dylan's goal in life was to make 'every girl' feel as if she were “IT”. Everyday was a thrilling adventure...our store was filled with a group of fun loving and wonderful employees. We could hardly wait for closing time so we could go and gallivant around town enjoying each others company. With each passing month, I truly did believe that I was 'in love' with this man, (And yes, he was a man...an older man as he had not been truthful about his age to all of us. One of the many red flags going off that I did not see.) His best friend Blake, in whom I had also gotten to be close to, had it bad for me, sharing one night that he knew I was the girl he wanted to marry. So there we were, a very unconventional trio. (I loved Dylan, Blake loved me and no one “loved” each other.)  You can only guess how miserable it was at times. Ah, unrequited love! Dylan let me know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I was not the one for him but he wanted us to hang out as friends. I gladly took whatever time he would give me, fooling myself with a false hope that perhaps I could somehow win his heart. So, Blake, Dylan and I continued to hang out together. (I can laugh at it now.) Whether it was late night desserts at Bob's Big Boy, eating at our favorite delightful smörgåsbord in Anaheim, going dancing or taking drives in the country, the three of us had some great times.


      I was quite taken aback when one afternoon my mom came to me and shared that she was very concerned.     “Susan, I have noticed that your personality has really changed. You are not that vivacious young woman I know. Your moods go up and down like a yo yo , often you are depressed and this seems to all have come about ever since you met Dylan.” (Now you have to understand, if anyone knew me , it was my mom who was my very best friend. ) I did not succeed in changing her mind or convincing her she was wrong. As I pondered her words, I went before the Lord and shared my heart with Him. Can you guess what He said?
      “Susan, your emotions for Dylan are contorting you. I want you to give him up to me and lay this relationship down.”

      “Wow Lord...how do I do that? We work together all the time. Do I just stop hanging out with him and Blake?”

     He showed me that He would take care of everything but that I was no longer to try and work the nights that Dylan worked and yes, I needed to stop going out with our eccentric and diverse trio.

     My world was crashing down around me How could I live without Dylan? Days and weeks passed. I tried and I tried but to no avail. I couldn't help it, I had to see him, so in disobedience to the Lord, I still sought him out, (every time getting hurt), changed my work schedule to fit his, and would wait long interminable hours just to see him and get his attention for a mere 5 minutes... If at all possible, I was even more miserable than before.

      This time  in my life was likened to the famous Irish proverb... “ Bad as I like Ye, it is worse without Ye.”

      One night, so very miserable and tormented, I cried out to the Lord , asking forgiveness for disobeying what He had asked me to do. “Lord, I want to obey you but I don't know how to let Dylan go. Will you please help me?” (It was obvious, I was emotionally held captive by this man.)

      As I was beginning to fall asleep, suddenly above me was the most awesome presence of God. It was euphoric, overflowing with a peace that I was not at all used to, (Especially since Dylan had come into my life.) I felt a little anxious not knowing what to do or say. My brother who had just returned from Bible school walked by my room and asked if I was still awake. I began telling him what was happening. He excitedly said, “Susan, just submit to God and allow Him to speak whatever He is wanting to say to you.” Thus I did...I don't remember all the words spoken, just that I surrendered to the will of the Lord , giving Him all of my heart. The very next morning, I woke up and something was missing.  I was 10 pounds lighter. I was filled with a joy and peace like never before. I went to work and guess what? I DID NOT CARE where Dylan was, when he was coming to work and was shocked at my new found freedom. Yes, the Lord had set me free. All the emotional bondage to this man was GONE. Shortly after this awesome deliverance, Dylan was let go form work. I saw him every now and then but never again did he have a hold on me. Not only was I free, but “that love” I thought I had for him was no longer there. My mom about fainted when I told her that he had asked me to move in with him and another roommate. I was not the same Susan any longer. His invitation did not even tempt me. Thank you Lord for setting me free and delivering me from an emotional bondage that the enemy would have loved to use to bring harm to my life. 


     Made whole through obeying the Lord 2 Kings5 1-19

      An honorable man and commander in the army, Naamon suffered with the disease of leprosy. He longed with all of his heart to be healed of this encumbering illness. The Prophet Elisha, a great man of God told Naamon he would be healed of his disease if he would go to the Jordan river and wash 7 times. Yes, He would have to dip in the river 7 times and then he would see his healing manifested. Mr. Naamon was not a happy camper but he did what Elisha told him to do. As he dipped in the water one, two and three times, he saw nothing...not one bit of change occurred . (Can you imagine what he was thinking and feeling?) Four, five and six times more,  he continued dipping in the water...still no miracle but after He had fully obeyed, the seventh time, his skin was restored to that of a little child. Lord you are so creative in our healings!


      Spring had arrived to Southern California. On this particular day in 1991 there was a strange coastal fog that graced us all. (Very mysterious and a little spectral.)  My husband and I had just spent the afternoon visiting my folks at their home in Laguna Niguel. It was a difficult day as my mom was battling an abundance of pain. Her esophageal cancer that had been in remission had returned. She was so uncomfortable with her pain that she actually asked Kit and I  to leave. (Never before had that happened.) It broke my heart as I did not want to leave her.  The helplessness I felt was overwhelming and grieved my heart so. I hugged and prayed for her as I embraced her frail body. Driving down the highway, suddenly out of nowhere, I felt like I was suffocating, unable to breathe. Crying out to Kit to stop the car, my heart racing along with a capacious anxiety filling my entire body, I knew I had to get out of the car. Quickly Kit pulled over to the side of the road. Neither one of us knew what to do. He asked if I could make it to the Von's grocery store up the road where I could get out and walk around. I rolled down the window taking deep breaths and we made it half a mile further. I paced in front of the market impeded with panic and angst for at least a half hour. Kit and I both were praying in tongues, crying out to the Lord to help me. Finally, a peace came over me and we made it home. I soaked in a hot tub trying so desperately to RELAX. (Have you ever TRIED to relax and it gets even worse with your body tensing up all the more?) Kit prayed over me and I finally fell asleep. As we woke up the next morning, all we could think of was that my heart had been affected by all the stress of my moms cancer returning. Kit called and  scheduled me for a complete heart work up at the doctors. As I sat there in the doctors office, ninety nine percent sure he was going to diagnose me with heart problems, I was surprised when he said; “Susan, your heart is perfectly fine. What I suspect is that you have an anxiety disorder...It is an illness that often times mimics all the signs of a heart attack.” I was relieved yet a bit frightened at what an anxiety disorder was. After our lengthy consultation he wrote me a prescription for Xanax. He asked that I find a good counselor to talk out my emotional issues regarding my moms cancer. With the Lords help, I found a great doctor and began counseling as well as taking the Xanax. The disorder got worse, yet was maintained through the meds. Soon after , I was on disability, resting and getting help to conquer the anxiety that was ruling my body and mind. A dear friend wrote to me and reminded me  of an important factor. “ Susan, Xanax is not the answer, it is only taking care of your symptoms, not the root issue. Pursue the Lord to get healing for  the root.” I stored his wisdom away as he too had faced this disorder and knew meds were just a temporary help. Each day , week and month that passed by, we watched as my moms cancer got worse. The Lord graciously allowed me to continue my counseling and the use of the Xanax to walk through this difficult time. Our summer was beyond hard...we lost my mom to cancer in mid August. It was the darkest time of my life. Within 3 months of her death,  *** a miracle happened. The Lord supernaturally healed me of the gripping and horrifying grief. At the same time, He also delivered me of the panic attacks associated with my moms death as well as the dependency I had come to have on the Xanax. My doctor was shocked that I just stopped taking the meds as she warmed me I would need to be weaned off... In His magnificent grace, the Lord healed it all at one time. I could not stop praising God for His goodness to me.

      Several years later during a stressful time in my life, the panic attacks returned. Was I destined to live with this disorder? The Lord had already delivered me from the spirit of fear and I did know with assurance that fear, (no matter what form it appeared in) was not in control of me on the inside as it once had been. When I battled it in the spirit, the fear and anxiety did leave but the battles were intense and this time accompanied by many physical symptoms. Immediately I was thinking to call my doctor and get the Xanax until the Lord spoke to me; ”Susan, this time you will not be taking any meds...I am going to heal the very root of this anxiety, not just your symptoms. Now that you have been set free of the spirit of fear, you are able to to battle this deep root within. You are able to do it now through me. Will you trust me?” I chose to trust though I wished I could take a pill that would mask it all. (I am being honest here.) My life as I knew it changed. I would wake up in the night gasping for breath, going to a movie was no longer a time of bliss as I could not stay in my seat more than a half hour at best until the battle began. Car rides were out, in fact hours away from our safe abode were no longer possible. I hated the attacks and I hated the battles. I wanted for it all to go away once and for all! I felt as if it was taking over my life. Lord what is the root of this that you are after? My meds this time were Jesus, Jesus and more of Jesus! He blessed me tremendously with Kit.  He prayed with me night and day, ran me hot bubble baths, rubbed my back, ordered many a pizza, and listened as I needed to share. Thank you Lord for my husband. Our dear friend and neighbor Sharlene prayed for me and the Lord showed her a vision in the spirit of a chain link... each link tightly entwined to the next. He told her that this was a generational bondage that wreaked havoc on many of the women in my family and that He was going to break this chain and set me free. I asked Him if there was anything I was to do in this healing process, His answer was yes! “Susan, I want you to attend Allie's bible studies this summer. In going I will set you free.” That was easy enough as I loved Allie's studies. Every time I got prayer and ministry at her studies, I saw subtle changes. I was filled with hope. For 3 months I went to her charming home in Cave Creek and eagerly hoped that each meeting I attended would be THE ONE where God would set me free. The end of summer arrived and I was still suffering with the attacks and intense battles .You can only guess what I was feeling, thinking and asking God in my feelings of defeat. I will never forget the night He showed me the root of the panic disorder. It was the fear of death so deeply embedded in me, I had no clue in my natural thinking that it was even there. He gave me the passage in Psalms, “For this is God, our God forever and ever, He will be our guide even to death.” When I read this, it was as if He was in the room, sitting on the couch with me, going to that deep fear He had exposed, then touching me, healing the root. He gave me an assurance that there was no reason to fear death. I was whole and free, right there on my couch in our living room. The Lord then showed me that He never told me it would be in Allies church that I would be healed...He had other reasons for me to go to her study.  As I had obeyed and attended her study the entire summer, He set me free. This time telling me it was gone for good...the anxiety would never haunt me again. The victory was His and to this day, many, many  years later, He has kept me free.

      Thank you Lord for healing me of both the physical and spiritual aspects of Anxiety disorder.Thank you that you go to the very roots within us that need your healing. I praise you Jesus for setting me free and keeping me free.


                                “If you stand, it will come”

      In Joshua 3 we see a wondrous miracle. God told the priests bearing the ark of the Lord to go and place their feet in the waters of the Jordan. He promised them that as they rested their feet in the water, He would give them a miracle... the waters of the Jordan would be cut off and the children of Israel would pass over the Jordan on dry ground. In this act of obedience and faith, neither the children of Israel or the priests saw the waters stop in a heap when they first obeyed God .The Lord stopped the waters just as He said He would but He stopped them upstream, ( quite a bit of a distance away from where the priests rested their feet in the Jordan.) They would see His promise come true but would have to stand in obedience and faith to SEE as it did not happen before their eyes instantaneously the moment they obeyed. So it is with us...we do not always SEE His promise when first we stand and obey . The temptation is to stop standing and to disobey in disillusionment.

      The grandiose season of Autumn had arrived. It is the season where our kitchen is filled with an aroma of the savory spices of curry, bay leaves, ginger, cumin, oregano and cinnamon... the time I take out all of my warm and cozy comfort food recipes as our weather begins to change. Out of every window we behold our yard as it begins its presentations of a cornucopia of vivid oranges, vibrant yellows and breathtaking reds. There is no season so rich in color! Filled with excitement and reverie, I start making my many trips climbing up and down our steep ladder, gathering all of my fall decor out of the attic. Within days, our home will be transformed into an autumn wonderland. This particular year, before I could even unpack all my boxes, I began having some quite alarming symptoms. I have always been a healthy person and was taken aback by this new ailment that was disturbing every aspect of my life. It began with a dull pain in my upper right side then, the pain began to be intense. I was so nauseas every morning, gagging, at times throwing up. (I was even asked by two people, "Could you  possibly be pregnant?”) I couldn't process certain foods and before I knew it, I was feeling crippled  and  unable to live my 'normal' healthy life with working out at the gym, cooking delicious meals, enjoying eating and living life to its fullest. As my husband and I went before the Lord we felt He told us it was my gall bladder. I began researching all about the gallbladder, Kit as well. As many of you know, sometimes getting on the Internet with symptoms, only brings bigger presumptions, fears and false alarm. ( I love the Yiddish proverb, “An imaginary ailment is worse than a disease.” ) (So true!) Because of the pain and concern, I was ready to go to the ER or call a doctor. We sought the Lord to hear His voice on the matter. He made it clear to us that I was not to go to the Emergency room or go to a doctor for tests. Thus came the trial of experiencing pain and frightful symptoms verses the word of the Lord. You know how when you have something new happening in your body, the  first thing that tries to comes in is fear? The fear itself is a battle as we begin to tear down all presumptions thoughts of what ifs , etc . Boy did the enemy throw some good ones at me..cancer like my mom, my heart, perhaps some unknown disease. The lessons for me from the Lord at this time were three things...listening, obedience and perseverance. With no peace to go to a doctor and the call to trust the Lord alone, I prayed and listened a lot. I called all of the people on my 'prayer warrior list', they prayed and their prayers helped for awhile but soon the pain and lurking fear returned. A friend had given me some pain pills but after a while, even they were not working. We were doing the natural things we knew to do...no fatty foods, no veggies, I drank a lot of water and apple cider vinegar, (Believing that if the pain was gall stones, that would be a huge help.) I stopped working out, was in bed a lot of the time but tried to keep our household going, learning that pain is pain, whether you are staying active or laying in bed. (Another lesson the Lord taught me during this time.) One night, right before bed when I was fixing my nightly apple cider vinegar in apple juice, I heard the Lord loud and clear speak the words “YOU ARE HEALED.” He assured me  He had healed me in Jesus and to stand, believing His words. That entire night I had no pain. (That within itself was a miracle as the pain had been so intense each night.) I thought to myself...hallelujah Jesus, I am healed. I was on cloud nine. The next day about 8:30 AM. all the pain dishearteningly ventured back. I panicked, doubted what I had believed I had heard from the Lord and was a wreck. It was another day of asking for prayer from my list...again, temporarily relief for awhile, then the pain came back. This is the part God was going to really grow me up in....He said I was healed yet my body was saying  that it was not true. Every bit of pain, nausea and not being able to eat said I was not healed. I chose to obey His spirit not the logic or normal counsel of the world. He instructed me what to eat and drink. Days went by and with each day passing, still with the pain and symptoms, I stood. I did not heed or allow myself to be moved by what I saw, thought or felt. Finally, all the symptoms immediately stopped in November. Now the truth is, I was healed of my gallbladder flare up the very night He spoke it to me, not when I didn't feel the symptoms any longer. That is what He taught me. God is always faithful to His word. Yes, I did dance for joy when there was no more nausea, pain, sickness and fear , (Believe me we had a great time of celebration) but I also learned to praise Him while in the midst of it all! Thank you Lord that when You speak comes into  BEING...Your spoken word CREATES life and is reality. What you say is TRUTH, not the things we feel, think, hear or see before us!

      I still h ad a few weeks left of my beloved season of fall. I quickly bedecked our home with scarecrows, pumpkins, bales of hay, beautiful fall foliage,  vibrant garlands and enjoyed my favorite Pumpkin spice candles. Soon, before we knew it Christmas would be upon us and an air of felicity would fill our home and hearts. I was thrilled at how each morning when I woke up, I could have my cup of coffee again, delicious farm fresh eggs , and normal, (well mostly normal ) food again. (Yes the Lord gave me some new instructions in my diet to prevent future attacks.) While walking through this trial, I had secretly prayed and asked the Lord that by my birthday in November, He would allow me to have a steak and a glass of Merlot for my special dinner. He granted my prayer as my gallbladder was as good as new. Thank you Lord for your  many miracles.  ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE with you and your grace to us can not be measured. 

      No matter the WAY or the TIMING in which the Lord brings forth His glorious transformations, healings and deliverance's within our lives...it is all HIM. Thank you Lord for all of your wondrous works ...You are forever faithful and your mercy endures forever!

      “Then They cried out to the Lord in their trouble And He saved them out of their distresses.  He sent His word and healed them and delivered them from their destruction's. Oh that men would give thanks to the Lord for His goodness and for His wonderful works to the children of men.” Psalms 107: 19-21

*** For the miraculous story of how the Lord healed me from the encumbering grief of my mom's death, please read the story "The Healing" in the Rabbits Trail section.   



Grantham, A story for all dog and God lovers! The Lord blessed Kit and I with our dream come true and a gift that would bless us more than we could imagine. 
An Appearance to Remember It was a dark, stormy day.....
The Letter I will never forget this night for as long as I live...God's grace is awesome.
The Healing In the midst of all of the heartache, something unbelievable happened....a warmth invaded my soul....
You Can Never Out*Give God...My gift of Addison There she was, unabashedly standing in front of our home, beckoning me....